Saxleather Blog

Urethral Play - Using a S(A)X Sound

Mistress 160 — Wed, 28 Jul 2010 03:38:58 +0000

Last year at Kinkfest, sol and I attended an excellent workshop on urethral play. Ever since then we’ve been wanting to experiment with this form of play, especially with sounds. A recent visit to S(A)X provide the perfect implement: a “hand made Stainless Steel Urethral Sound, made in the Sax metal workshop, only the best medical toy you have used!”.

It looks like this:

Because I’d not written about urethral play and sounding on my blogs before I decided to turn the post into part of my BDSM For Beginners Series. You can find the post on my main blog here and on my BDSM For Beginners blog here.

Ms160 using S(A)X’s sound on sol

There is actually not a huge amount online about urethral play, and most of what you’ll find is from a male perspective. Wiki gives a vanilla view, which is not very helpful for kinksters. I think KennedyRay provides a good intro to the topic, in a BDSM context:

“Urethral play is play that involves inserting objects into the urethra, and sometimes the bladder. In some cases, these scenes can be associated with people into medical scenes (playing amateur urologist hour), or in the BDSM scene, is closely associated with control and dominance. For the submissive/bottom, the psychological idea of being violated in such a manner, the inability to control bladder functions (if catheters are inserted into the bladder) along with the physiological sensitivity of the urethral lining can be quite a trip…

“In urethral play, you generally have two kinds of instruments that you can use. A sound is one type of device that comes in a variety of widths and is inserted into the shaft. Most people who are heavily into the use of sounds usually try to dilate or stretch the urethra, although there are many who get into seeing how far they can go as well. Sounds are sort of like wands usually made out of surgical stainless steel”

These days sounding is also called cock stuffing. Here’s part of a detailed post from Alice of Go Ask Alice:

“Cock-stuffing, or “sounding” as it is called in the S&M community, involves inserting smooth, long, and thin surgical steel rods called “sounds” (hence the name “sounding”) into a man’s urethra. The two most commonly used “sounds” are the Van Buren, which has a J-shaped curve on the end, and the Dittle, which is straight. Other objects … may do the trick, but metal sounds are recommended because they are easier to clean and have no chance of breaking when in use”

You’ll find a lot of posts online from men interested in this topic, who put all sorts of items down their cock. I must say, after doing the research for this post I am STUNNED by the things men put down their dicks. Alice was replying to a man who used a glass thermometer. Other guys write about using “nicely rounded, tapering plastic pens” , “a smooth toothbrush handle” or “a long length of fishing line folded in two (fold goes in first)” … oh and this bloke, AnythingGoes, who in his reply to KennedyRay’s Urethral Play post definitely lives up to his name:

“corn kernels, pencils, pens, brushes, tools, nails, screws, bolts ( ones so fat I had to literally screw them all the way in) wires, toothbrushes, paperclips, hollow wall anchors that I then enlarge once in by putting a screw into it, tubes, hangers, sticks, plant stalks. And a plethora of other items …

“it is very addicting. So much so that I have gone even kinkier. I have slid small fish out of fishtank into the head of my dick. I have even slid a fat earthworm almost all the way in. Made sure not to let him go. I have put moths and several different kinds of small bugs and beetles just inside also. The sensation of them moving in there is almost instant orgasm. I dream of trying a small snake at some point. Has anyone else ever done any of this?”

It’s important I quote another line of this truly mad bastard, as well: “I have been lucky and never had an infection“. He’s not fucking wrong, lol. As Alice notes, in response to the thermometer guy:

“Just because you “don’t do it often” doesn’t mean you needn’t do it safely each time. Leave the thermometers, with the risk of broken glass and mercury poisoning, behind and invest in a “steel” sound”.

Here’s ChaseUnion:

“The question of what to insert up one’s own, or anyone else’s, urethra is of paramount importance and might be best answered, any medical instrument or device which: (1) was made with the express purpose of urethral insertion, (2) has been “terminally” sterilized by a sterilization process which kills viruses (more about this later but suffice it to say that “boiling doesn’t cut it”), and (3) slides in under its own weight or with minimal pressure. We’ll elaborate on these later and even give a few exceptions, but these are the basic qualifications of any urethral insertion procedure. Knitting needles, dowel rods, chopsticks, pencils, toothbrush handles, coat hangers, and rat-tail files are all equally unsuitable.”

Absolutely. And that includes wiggling wild life! So … what exactly is a sound? Here’s ChaseUnion again:

“In the “good old days” before penicillin, gonorrhea was much more difficult to cure and many times left scar tissue behind, causing “strictures” which partially or completely closed off the urethra, making urination difficult if not impossible. Some benevolent medicos (Drs. VanBuren and Dittel, to name two), seeking methods to relieve this problem, designed instruments to be inserted into the urethra to locate the stricture and literally stretch it open to allow the passage of urine. Thus was born the urethral “sound” which takes it name from the Latin subordinate, to submerge to measure the depth of.

“This is the same “sound” as used in the term “sound the depths,” where the depth of a body of water is measured with a weighted line”.

You’ll find lots of different types of sounds listed for sale at various adult / kinky stores. S(A)X has an excellent range. They all look slightly different - some are straight, some are slightly curved, some are curved to follow the natural shape of the penis.

Van Buren Sounds from S(A)X

They are usually made out of surgical stainless steel.

What type is best to buy? It’s up to you, really, in terms of what you want to try. They all do slightly different things. As Tom Gordon points out:

“There is a curve in the male plumbing system; the curve on the Van Buren sound is designed to accommodate that curve, allowing the sound to slip down the penis and into the bladder easily. The problem is that if the bottom gets hard during the process of insertion one has to wait until the erection subsides, as the curved sound cannot be inserted (or removed!) if the penis is hard.

“It is possible to negotiate the curve with the straight Dittle sound by changing the angle of the penis during insertion, but this requires a bit more skill and sensitivity on the part of the top. The diameter of sounds, catheters and some other medical instruments is expressed in the French system. One French unit (Fr) is .33 millimeters (.3 mm for ease of discussion). Thus, an instrument which is 20 Fr is 20 x .3 = 6 mm in diameter (0.24″).

“Most men can, without discomfort, take a much larger sound than you might imagine. That being said however, for first timers, or those who haven’t done it on a regular basis, starting out with the smaller sound diameters (i.e., 16 Fr or 18fr) and work up to the larger diameters as it feels comfortable to do so. The idea, of course, is to stretch the urethra just a bit”

ChaseUnion gets it right when they write that:

“The dynamics of urethral insertion are those of invasion and control of a very private and personal area and function”

ManyOohs4U wrote on Fetlife that:

“People do sounding (1) for the sexual stimulation, (2) to enlarge their urethra, which they find interesting or exciting, and some on here do it to an EXTREME extent, or (3) use it as a base for other stimulation, applying a vibrator to it, or electro-sex signals”.

I must admit that what really turned sol and I on at the workshop on sounding was discussion about the possibilities of electrical play .. something to look forward to!

Although lots of people write that they enjoy sounding, it’s quite rare to get a good description of what it actually feels like. The word “intense” gets used at lot. And I’m not the only one who’s noticed this. Here’s Sammael describing a sounding demo:

“The word “intense” is frequently used, and when the demonstration guy was asked to describe it, that was about the only word he could come up with (it was his first time experiencing it). That, and that it felt good.”

So: be warned … it’s going to be an intense experience!

What about from the “other” side? From the point of view of the other person doing the sounding, if it’s not a solo scene? Well, I can tell you from experience that’s “intense” as well, lol, and other tops agree. Lady Hotchkiss found her first sounds experience:

“Intensely erotic and sensual, WOW! … a very focused, deliberate, slow, sensual experience for all 4 people involved. It was an extraordinary way to spend an afternoon”

Some people like to call sounding a form of CBT play, but I think it’s a completely different ball game. Jade puts it best on this Eden Cafe thread about urethral play:

“Urethral play, play that involves catheterization and/or the use of sounds, is not meant to be S/M play. It is not used to hurt someone. There are lots and lots of places and ways to hurt someone that is safe and acceptable. A person’s urethra is not one of them. While Ms. Cynthia noted the many ways that sounds and catheters could be used in a D/s scene, in order to cause the bottom emotional and/or mental distress (especially in the case of catheters, which are often used in humiliation scenes) she stressed several times that urethral play is, sensation play, not pain play. This is play that is meant to be pleasurable, and if it is hurting, you’re doing something wrong”.

You can read about our first sounding scene in my BDSM For Beginners post. I had been looking forward to talking to sol about what sounding feels like. I’d mentioned in my BDSM For Beginners post how lots of people give great quotes about WHY they do sounding but no one says HOW it feels. But interestingly I encountered the same verbal block with sol. It seems sounding is simply a very difficult sensation to describe. Sol ended up calling it “a unique sensation”.

“it feels very sensitive … it’s a very delicate sensation … it isn’t intensely pleasurable … more subtle … some people say about power exchange, to me it does require a kind of surrender and letting go to do it”

This reminded me of something Tom Gordon had mentioned:

“You will discover that the bottom experiences great pleasure when the sound is inserted to a certain depth. The top should gently manipulate the sound at that point; the sound is probably stimulating the prostate gland intensely, and in a way not possible through any other sexual technique.

“Most bottoms enjoy seeing the insertion, especially the sound vanishing into the penis by its own weight. Many bottoms have expressed amazement to me that such a large object could go so far in without pain. They feel a sense of complete submission of their most intimate orifice and a voluntary vulnerability beyond any previous experience”

I asked sol whether he wanted to do it again:

“absolutely … enthusiastically … frequently … lol … please…”

That’s a yes then… The second time we played we did go in a little deeper, and we’ll keep working on that and keep blog readers advised. … and says sol, combine it with a TENS until when we get one…

You can either buy sounds in sets or individually. Remember Chase Union’s advice:

“Dilators are sold singly or in sets of 8 (in a small case) and are double ended. Sounds are sold singly–almost never in sets–and are single ended”

The sound we use is hand made at S(A)X, “hand made Stainless Steel Urethral Sound, made in the Sax metal workshop, only the best medical toy you have used!”. You can purchase it here, if you’d like to try it. I certainly recommend it. We’ve had a lot of fun with it … and we’ve only just begun.

If you’d like to peruse full sets check out this link.

Another aspect of sounds that you might like to explore is jewelry that incorporate sounds, such as cock wands, plugs and wedges. One we’ve always wanted to try is the Prince Albert’s Wand, which is:

“in its simplest form, is a urethral sound held in place by a PA piercing (although any urethral piercing - ampallang, PA, or apadravya - can hold them). Its purpose is urethral stimulation. Most people wear them only for play, but some people wear them all the time”

I’ve also seen urethral vibrators for sale:

I think that is the next toy we’ll buy from S(A)X *grin*.

I’m sure you can now see what I mean, about the potential of urethral play toys . They all sound like fun … if you’ll excuse the pun

REFERENCES AND ONLINE RESOURCES:

BMEzine.com - article with links to images of urethral sounds

Chase Union:

Difference between sounds and dilators (shows different urethral sound instruments and their use; explains about different size metrics and types)
You’re going to put a what?? Up my what?? (great info and anatomy diagrams about how to proceed)

Go Ask Alice!: “Cock-stuffing”

Kennedy Ray - Urethral play

Tom A Gordon - Sounds series (republished on several sites including MedicalToys.com)

Savage Love - “Playing Doctor” October 18, 2001

Wiki Urethral Sounds

FORUMS:
Fetlife’s sounding groups have threads on how to proceed and good links etc:

Bad Dragon - Forum:

forum thread on sounding and stuffing

BDSM weblog:

forum thread - “sounding and staples and ..”

Tribes threads:

Sin Central:

Urethral sounding / stretching

BOOKS:
Hardy Haberman, Fetish Diva Midori.
The Family Jewels: A Guide to Male Genital Play and Torment.
Greenery Press, 2001. ISBN 189015934

Thank you:
Sincere thanks to Steve Sax for providing the fabulous implement
that’s guiding our sounding explorations!

Photos:
Ms160
Sound and urethral vibrator - S(A)X

S(A)X’s “The Rod” (Delrin cane)

Mistress 160 — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 05:59:20 +0000

We were really delighted to try out S(A)X’s wonderful The Rod.

Steve very kindly gave us one of these new toys during our last visit, hot off the production line. It’s made of Delrin. S(A)X’s website describes it as:

“strong, hard and rigid. An excellent engineering plastic where dimensional stability combined with high creep resistance and the ability to withstand fatigue are a necessary requirement … The Rod … is a S(A)X masterpiece, it is flexible, long lasting and stings like HELL!“

He’s not wrong, there. Delrin is really interesting stuff. Here’s Wiki:

“Polyoxymethylene (commonly referred to as POM and also known as polyacetal or polyformaldehyde) is an engineering thermoplastic used in precision parts that require high stiffness, low friction and excellent dimensional stability. It is commonly known under DuPont’s trade name Delrin”

It has a wide variety of uses. Here are a few from Wiki, but it’s worth visiting the actual page to read the full list:

“Delrin has also recently found use in the manufacturing of Irish flutes (traditionally made of wood), tin whistles (traditionally made of metal), and bagpipes (traditionally made of wood). Delrin flutes sound similar or identical to wooden flutes, but have none of the shrinkage or cracking issues usually associated with wooden instruments in hot, cold, or dry environments. Builders such as Des Seery, Michael Cronnolly of M&E Flutes, Tony Dixon, and Rob Forbes build Delrin flutes.

“Delrin has become an increasingly popular material for guitar picks … such as the Dunlop “Tortex” pick gained popularity due in part to an international ban on the trade of tortoiseshell in the late 1970s, which was then a common material used for guitar picks.

“Delrin is also much treasured by many makers and players of harpsichords, being used for the plectra … Delrin has been used for many years by a number of cutlery manufacturers to make knife handles, especially for jacknives. Delrin is used to make combination wheels in most high-security safe locks … It is also used to make frame sliders and knee pucks for motorcycle riders/racers, as well as for slide gloves used when longboarding. Delrin is gaining popularity for the manufacture of diving equipment, due to its light weight and its low porosity to gas under pressure.. Delrin is also being commonly used as a substitute for horn in the koiguchi on modern-made Japanese swords”

And the list goes on and on … oh, and this, too:

“Delrin has been used increasingly to create body-piercing jewelry, especially tunnels or plugs for use in stretched holes”

And it makes a VERY nice fiendish Rod. We took The Rod with us on our recent long drive to Sydney. We stayed overnight in an old fashioned motel, and out came the new toy:

Impressive, isn’t it? It only comes in black and the hitting part of it is 60cm (24″) long. The total length including the timber handle is 90cm (36″).

We’d seen Delrin canes advertised on various sites but hadn’t had the chance to try them. They always sounded like they worked well. Cane-IAC writes about their Delrin collection:

“These canes are very strong and will stand up to just about anything you can throw at them or throw them at. The other very big advantage to this collection is that they are easy to keep clean and sanitized”

These all sounded like useful points for modern kinksters, especially those who share their implements with more than one person. Natural material canes may retain germs and it’s tricky to clean wood (which reacts to cleaning substances such as Clorox wipes or simple household glass cleaner) without damage. Acrylic and Delrin canes don’t have these problems.

So, how do they feel? Sherie of The Dixie Within reviewed Cane-IAC’s delrin Master’s Choice SR and found it:

“much thuddier and heavier than what I am used to … but it was nice in it’s own right. My ideal fun spanking starts with sting goes to thud and ends with sting so in a caning session this makes the perfect middle segment. It has just enough weight to it for a moderate “cooldown” in the caning before ending with the “big finish”"

We found The Rod to work in a similar fashion. For our first session with this new toy I directed sol to stretch face down and bum up on the motel’s bed. I warmed him up with my hand:

And then applied The Rod:

Delrin is flexible and it took a few practice strokes to get the feel of the implement. You do have to be careful because it’s length makes wrapping a distinct possibility. But once you work out how and where it’s going to land, it becomes much easy to use … and I could really begin to apply it. I loved the way it bounced on the skin. And loved the marks that soon appeared:

When sol and I talked about how it felt later we agreed that it somehow crossed the line between thuddy and stingy, being both. It’s density made it thuddy … and yet as Steve Sax so accurately observes on his site:

“it stings like HELL!“

LOL. As sol rediscovered, when I finished the scene with a few light taps on his balls:

While we were in Sydney we attended a Femdom tea party hosted by MzAntonina. I decided to share The Rod with my dominant friends, to see how they found it. Here is MzAntonina swishing the cane back and forth, near sol’s rear end, prior to striking:

Lady Lubyanka made an interesting comment a couple of years back that:

“Delrin unfortunately doesn’t audibly swoosh through the air anywhere near as pleasingly as other materials – my guess is that this is because Delrin itself has such a low friction coefficient (very slippery stuff)”

However, I found in The Rod’s case, it still had a satisfying swoosh. Here is MzAntonina applying The Rod:

MsGawjusRedhead also kindly tried the cane on sol. Here’s the final result:

(note the wrapping while we were all getting to know The Rod)

We agreed The Rod handled nicely and produced a deep and very satisfying thud. Bethie of SpankingBethie found the same thing:

[Our] large delrin cane is flexible but heavy so it delivers a very thuddy stroke. I prefer this cane to our rattan cane because of the thud factor. The effect is a deep, burning thud. Our thinner delrin canes can really leave a stinging sensation so it’s a toss up between them and the rattan. It’s one line of fire versus another and I really can’t decide which is better”

Indeed. Our only concerns with The Rod were minor - the size of the handle is a bit large for some female hands, and the the loop at the end of the handle is rather large too, and kept getting caught on other toys / fingers etc. Tying a knot in it fixed that.

All in all we found ourselves agreeing with Lady Lubyanka that:

“Delrin is in many ways a stunning material for canes – very slippery and smooth, retains its shape well, stable in most environmental conditions, hygienic, easy to clean and store, and can produce a wide variety of sensations, ranging from “mmmmmmmmm” to “ooooooohhhhhhhh” to “aaahhh!” to “fuuuuckkkkkk!!” to “Hey, OWW!!“

Lady Lubyanka also feels that:

“Because Delrin canes are extremely easy to wield dangerously, and represent a high risk of significant pain, marking, and injury, I would suggest that any Delrin canes … are unsuitable for less experienced tops”

Something to keep in mind. However I think with care, less experienced kinksters can still have a lot of fun with The Rod. I’ll keep you informed of future scenes that include it

Photos:
S(A)X and Ms160

BON4 review

Mistress 160 — Fri, 25 Jun 2010 00:43:53 +0000

My husband solipsist and I have been exploring orgasm control and chastity play for some time now. Sol has been wearing the CB6000 (which you can also buy at S(A)X) since it was very kindly gifted to us by friends last year. We’ve had enormous enjoyment out of this device. However because it’s plastic main cage has split five times under pressure … a problem encountered by many wearers of the device … we’ve reached the point where we only take the CB6000 out for specific play now and then. Which means we’ve been searching for a more long term chastity device.

We’ve had enough experience with chastity devices to understand that there is no one perfect chastity device out there that we can recommend to those of you who ask our advice in their search for “the perfect devise”. Everyone’s anatomy is different. And therefore everyone’s experiences of each device are going to be different. What’s comfortable for you may not be comfortable for us, and vice versa. So please keep this in mind when you read the following review.

We’d been very interested in the Birdlocked, the first silicone device on the market. However the price was horrifically high at the time, and good friends who’d purchased the device had had problems. It was at this point that we visited S(A)X’s leather workshop at Byron Bay, and discussed reviewing the just released BON4 - the second silicone device on the market.

You can read the full review on my blog here. It’s long and very detailed, but someone on Fetlife did call it “awesome”, which was nice. What’s important to cross post here I think, are the device’s technical details and then our conclusions.

THE BON4 - TECHNICAL DETAILS

Pretty, isn’t it?

You’ll find the BON4 website here. The BON4’s technical details are reproduced on S(A)X’s page about the product: “The Bon4 Male Chastity Device … is supplied with three ring sizes of flexible silicone that interlock with the comfortable silicone cage. The device is fully adjustable and will fit anyone. Simply choose the cock ring that fits the best and fit it around your penis and testicles. Then attach the cage and interlock them with the silicone belt. Add the padlock and lock things down!”

“Approx. 4.3 (111 mm) inches in total length; internal cage length approx. 2.5 (65 mm) inches in length; cage opening approx. 1.4 (35 mm) inches. Ring sizes are approx. 1.6 inches (41 mm), 1.9 inches (47 mm), and 2.1 inches (52 mm). The fully assembled weight is 90gms”

The manufacturer also makes the claim: “Because BON4 comes with 3 different sizes of cockrings. it will fit anybody”. This claim worried me right from the start … and I was right about that…

MISTRESS160 AND SOLIPSIST’S CONCLUSIONS

BON4 copy on left + Birdlocked on right
being sold by Birdlocked in June 2010
on the bon4-chastity site

We wanted to complete a two week period of wear before reviewing the BON4 for S(A)X. This review period was extended due to sol’s injuries and so I could document the underhand tactics of Birdlocked, who flooded the internet with fake BON4 distribution websites selling fake copies of the BON4 in mid June 2010, two months after the BON4’s release.

For this reason I sincerely recommend anyone wanting to buy the BON4 purchases it from a reputable distributor like S(A)X.

During our first week wearing the BON4 we found lots of positives. As a wearer, sol found it more comfortable than the CBs because of the soft silicone. It allowed him to sleep through the night. It fitted better under clothes. It was great for travel (both flying and driving). And there was no constant worry about the device splitting (like the CB6000). He did experience some problems peeing in the device, which we thought might be made worse by his PA piercing.

As an owner / keyholder I really liked the look of the device and the fact it’s soft to touch and yet cuts sensation. Most importantly, from a psychological point of view the device worked extremely well. While wearing it sol quickly achieved the submissive mindset I enjoy … which became even more pronounced when the device was removed for play. So the BON4 certainly works well as a chastity device.

However after a single week, sol had enough small - but I have to be honest here, extremely painful - injuries that they added up to significant discomfort and required the device’s removal for several days and finally, the termination of the two week trial. You’ll find photos in our original review.

We identified two reasons for these injuries.

The first was poor fit. Sol falls between the ring sizes currently available with the device. For him one ring is too tight, the next sized ring too loose. Ironically while BON4 only produces three cock rings, Birdlocked has produced it’s fake BON with five differently sized rings … one of which would have fitted sol perfectly.

The second reason was poor design, with severe pinching occurring where the device joins together. For more details see my full review.

Our trial has proved that the manufacturer’s claim that “because BON4 comes with 3 different sizes of cock rings it will fit anybody” is incorrect. If we had the option to discuss the design of this device with the BON4’s manufacturer, we’d suggest:

having more ring sizes available, to widen fitting options. They can still sell the BON4 kit with three rings but at least advise purchasers that other sized rings are available if required

altering the design of the BON4 cock rings so their edges are further rounded, to avoid rubbing / pressure injuries (Birdlocked got this detail right)

slightly enlarging the center hole to help with the peeing problem, so that pee does not build up in the cage (which Birdlock avoids with the extra air holes

With regret we cannot suggest a solution for the severe pinching where the device joins together.

So, do we recommend this product?

As a short term chastity device, absolutely we recommend it. For all the positive reasons we’ve given above. I think it is especially good for men who have active lives and for men who travel. For example, it would be an ideal device to lock your partner in prior to a short business trip.

For longer wear, we simply can’t recommend it because we experienced too many injuries. It’s very important you make sure you fit the rings that are available before you purchase it - if you’ve worn a CB device you’ll have worn similarly sized rings. My original review discusses how to determine your ring size if you have not worn a different type of device that uses them. I do not recommend you buy the fake BON rings from Birdlocked, even if they have a size that fits you. Apart from the ethics of such a transaction I have no idea whether the rings are well made - they may have even sharper edges than the BON4’s.

I sincerely hope that very soon the makers of the BON4 will offer more rings. At which point sol and I will be able to purchase one that fits better and the BON4 will move from a short term chastity device to one that we can use for much longer periods. Although we’ll still need to keep an eye on that pinching where the two parts join.

I think the BON4 - and silicone as a base material - has potential. Silicone offers amazing opportunities as an alternative to metal and plastic devices. Yes, there are teething problems … but what new chastity device doesn’t experience them? And as all of us who are interested in male chastity know, what works for one person - or in this case, one reviewer - doesn’t for another. Everyone’s anatomy is different, and therefore their experiences of each device is different.

Sol says that the next generation of BON (meaning the BON4 manufacturer’s future version of the device, not the appalling ripoff by Birdlocked) will probably be the perfect male chastity device. And I agree. But believe me, you can still have a hell of a lot of short term chastity fun with the BON4.

SINCERE THANKS:

to Steve Sax of S(A)X for kindly thinking of us as reviewers for this product
servingb, and members of Fetlife male chastity groups, Chastity Mansion Forum and Chastity Lifestyle Forum

PHOTOS:
S(A)X Ms160 bon4-chastity site

BON4 chastity device

Mistress 160 — Thu, 27 May 2010 22:27:47 +0000

We are currently in the process of trialing the BON4 chastity device for review here on S(A)X’s blog. You can read more about the device - and purchase it - here.

Back soon to tell you how it’s going!

Buying and using paddles

Mistress 160 — Tue, 20 Apr 2010 03:59:34 +0000

I was having a peruse of S(A)X’s paddles and slappers page today and admiring the many wonderful implements available.

It brought back memories of one item that we purchased many years ago, which still gives us lots of enjoyment: the leather and fur strop. You can see a photo of it at the top of this post.You can also purchase a round leather and fur paddle which I believe make a perfect first paddle purchase.

The leather and fur strop was one of the first impact play toys we ever purchased and it is still being used … in fact I even included it in my BDSM for Beginners blog post about assembling your first toy box, as well as a blog post about sol’s and my all time favorite toys. You can see it hanging to the left of the group of our impact play toys in the photo below:

And on this tray, used for another scene at home:

Sorry, it’s sort of under the red table tennis paddle on the left, lol, but you get the idea - it’s one of those impact play implements you find you are always using!

When I first purchased it I was looking for something that could be applied sensuously as well as with more force, because we were just learning about impact play.

Like most kinksters interested in impact play or sensation play we’d started out doing lots of extremely erotic spanking. To begin with I’d used my open hand, with sol bent over my knees. I loved this, it felt so intimate and of course it needed no special “kinky equipment”.

But after a few intense sessions my hand started giving out, long before we wanted to finish. I soon realized I needed something else, if we wanted to take this type of sensation play further.

So we started looking at rigid implements. Riding crops and canes seemed a bit too fierce at that point, they produce a sharp “stingy “sensation and we wanted to stay with the dull “thuddy” sensation of wide implements such as my open hand or perhaps a paddle…

Paddles are highly recommended for new kinksters … and were exactly what we needed. They were perfect for the kind of intimate play we’d been doing, either over the knee spanking or in bed. Firm enough to be accurate and not require a lot of training to use, and effective in many different shapes and materials. Paddles are usually broad at one end and narrow at the other. In BDSM the term “paddle” can also be applied to implements like wooden spoons and or hair brushes. Some people also use table tennis paddles (you can see one in the photo above of my own toys) but be aware some people experience an allergic reaction after play.

Straps, strops, slappers, tawses etc are used in similar ways to paddles but are thinner. Some have two layers … or more. You move on to these when you decide it’s time for more intense, stingy sensations.

These types of implements are usually made of wood, rubber or leather. You can also make your own implement or even buy some really beautifully hand crafted paddles and strops at many shops online, some based on historical designs (like the tawse) which have a fetish appeal for some kinksters. These make wonderful additions to your toy box, but to start your collection you’ll want some practical, classic designs that are not too expensive … which is why we bought our own first paddles here at S(A)X and recommend you do too.

A quick glance at S(A)X’s paddles and slappers page will reveal a range of both leather and rubber implements. If you are a beginner, you might like to try the leather versions first. Leather “gives” more than wood and is more precise than rubber. The latter, while it has a magical intensity all of it’s own (I remember one designer of toys writing that it leaves a “memory” after each stroke, and that the effect is cumulative), on the practical side is very flexible and takes some practice to be accurate.

Which brings me to how do you use one of these toys.

Well, it’s pretty easy. Go for something firm at the beginning, that you feel you control as you strike. Remember, while a large paddle may look scary, the force is spread out over a larger skin surface area, and so may be less intense than a longer, thinner implement of equal weight. If you want to try a strop or slapper toy that’s less intense, look for designs with two layers of leather - these slap against each other, mitigating the force while creating a very scary noise that will put fear into your sub!

The best place to apply these types of toys is across your sub’s backside, over both cheeks. I love doing this with sol, as his bottom provides a nicely padded working surface! After a few strokes his cheeks turn a lovely pink. Less flexible toys still create great marks, usually bruises rather than stripes.

For me it’s important to alternate impact play with lighter more sensous play, so the moment I saw S(A)X’s leather and fur implement I had to buy it. I love applying the leather side to sol’s backside until it turns a deep pink, then turning the strop / paddle over and running the sensuous fur gently over his burning skin.

As you build up confidence and want to try for more intensity, move from larger and wider products to narrow and more flexible toys.

You’ll also see paddles on this site made with holes (here is a rubber example) and might wonder about their intensity during play. The holes decrease resistance to the air and decrease the mass of the paddle, making it easier to get moving. They also decrease the surface area of the paddle, making a smaller area to distribute force. What all this means is paddles with holes are for more severe play. And leave wonderful marks.

Have fun paddling

(Photos: S(A)X and Ms160)

Want Mistress160 to review a particular product?

Mistress 160 — Sat, 20 Mar 2010 04:04:42 +0000

Want me to review a particular S(A)X product, or discuss a particular BDSM topic?

Drop me a line or a comment below and let me know what interests you

The delights of flogging with French suede…

Mistress 160 — Thu, 18 Feb 2010 04:33:51 +0000

There are some really great whips and floggers available via S(A)X’s website, made from all sorts of materials, including rubber, leather, suede … even horsehair! You’ll find a link to them here.

I must admit my personal favorite is Steve’s French suede flogger, a very popular design he has been making for many years now.

Our red suede flogger (which you can see hanging next to our hammock at our Northern Rivers property, in the photo above) was one of the very first S(A)X items we purchased. We were looking for a flogger suitable for new kinksters who were still learning about sensation play, and suede is much softer than hide.

The wide suede falls or tails (there are twenty) on this flogger can be used very gently. The experience is thuddy rather than stingy, if you are on the receiving end … although the points (tips) of the falls can sting … it all depends how you wield it. I’ve heard suede floggers described as perfect implements for providing a good massage! They are also great warm up … and scene closing … implements, if you are more experienced. For implements that provide more sting and less thud, try heavier thin leather falls, or rubber or horsehair (super stingy!!).

I also find the suede handle grips well during play. If you prefer a wooden handle, have a look at another style of flogger which Steve stocks, which combines thirty French suede falls with a timber handle.

There is also a smaller “Little Stinger” version of this style available.

As you can see from S(A)X’s photos, for both the larger suede styles you may choose your colour (red, black, blue or purple) and re the style we own, you may also choose the length of your falls - the one you can see in the photo at the top of the post is an example of the longest falls available, which I then shortened slightly to suit my height.

We’ve had lots of fun with our suede flogger. It’s taken a lot of use but still looks great, which is typical of the quality of S(A)X products. I definitely recommend you try one!

Sensation play with clamps…

Mistress 160 — Mon, 01 Feb 2010 08:15:10 +0000

I’m often asked by new kinksters about simple but effective ways to play.

Pressure play, I reply. Clamps. And why do we like playing with clamps? Because clamping is a form of sensation play. Clamps create erotic sensations by cutting off circulation. And clamps are a great technique for beginners - you can make clamp play as mild or painful as you like. Also clamping doesn’t require any special skill - you’ll pick up what you need as you learn how your partner’s body responds to clamping. Plus you’ll probably have most of the “toys” you’ll need at home: clothes pegs (or clothes pins), bamboo skewers, a ball of string, rubber bands, etc… see, told you it was easy!

Some points to keep in mind when starting to play with clamps:

start with a low clamping pressure and work up
start with what your sub can endure, then work up to higher endurance slowly
don’t leave pegs on more than twenty minutes - keep a clock / timer in your play space
the longer the clamping time, the more fierce the sensation caused by removing the pressure

Obviously we are not going to leave clamps in place too long (never more than 20 minutes) or place them on places near blood vessels / nerves, or where damage (such as the corpus cavernosum and corpus spongiosum of the penis, and tissues of the clitoral hood in women) can occur. Are we?!

My favorite places (on both sexes) are nipples and genitals. But I’ve seen pegs used in many places and for all sorts of purposes. I’ve sometimes created lines of pegs on sol’s belly and flicked them off with a cane.

Places I’ve used pegs:

labia (avoid genital jewelry)
cock and balls
nipples (avoid jewelry)
around the breast
perineum and ass cheeks
earlobe and sides of ear (avoid jewelry)
tongue and lips (VERY painful)
around navel (avoid jewelry)
webbing between fingers and toes
inner thighs

I must say, nipples remain a favorite place to torment. There are many ways to put a clamp on a nipple. The key thing to remember here is placement. A clothes peg placed on the tip of the nipple is much more intense than one placed closer to the base of the nipple.

You can read more about clamp play in my BDSM For Beginner’s blog post here. The post also shows you how to set up a scene featuring clamps, and outlines ways you can up the pressure and sensation. At the extreme end of the latter are Japanese clover clamps:

Can you see their grip in the photo at the top of this post? It’s ferocious. These you won’t have sitting around the house LOL but I really do recommend you invest in a pair. They are invaluable, my husband Sol loves / hates them, I rarely have a scene where they are not used.

Mostly they come attached via a chain, which makes nipple play perfect. I love the fact that pulling on the chain tightens the clamps even further (the center section, on which the chain is connected, tightens the ends when pulled). Also with metal clamps you can incorporate temperature play into the experience by chilling or warming the clamps before you use them. Which reminds me that temperature play and wax play are both good forms of play to follow on from clamps…

I definitely recommend a pair of Japanese Clover Clamps for your toybox. You can purchase them here at S(A)X in a very elegant black … I’d also suggest having a look at all the other nipple clamps on offer

Have fun!

Photos: Ms160

Ever wanted to try chastity play?

Mistress 160 — Tue, 05 Jan 2010 08:10:45 +0000

Recently Sol and I have been experimenting with chastity play. Some very kind friends gave us a CB-6000 Male Chastity Device while we were attending KinkFest in Melbourne, and this device has given us a great deal of enjoyment.

So what is chastity play? There is a great article reproduced with permission from www.chastity-uk.co.uk in the Chastity section of this website, which I’ll also quote in part here:

“Male chastity belts and devices were developed to prevent “self abuse”, “self pollution”, “nocturnal emissions” and “insanity, imbecility and feeble mindedness” which were considered to be the natural fate of any young man with lax moral attitudes! Today’s modern stainless steel chastity belt was developed by improving upon the Florentine design by Hal Higginbottom in the late 1950s. Since 1958 Hal produced male and female chastity belts from his workshop in Sheffield, England, under the brand name of Tollyboy. His craftsmanship was of excellent quality and his belts were considered to be the “Rolls Royce” of chastity belts.

“It is Hal Higginbottom who was credited with bringing the chastity belt into the 20th Century … The Tollyboy design was adapted in the USA by Jones and Access Denied (01/07/1997), and in Germany by Neosteel … Today the Tollyboy name lives on with Richard Davies (apprentice to Hal) continuing to produce the “Florentine” design, made to measure, steel chastity belts for men and women.

“Since the late 1990s the availability of male chastity devices is much higher. Major Players have been Frank & Doris Miller who launched the CB-2000 in 1998. It was the world’s first easily available hygienic male chastity device. The Millers have since gone from strength to strength adding the Curve to their range for the “larger” man and in August 2003 introduced the third design the CB-3000. World-wide sales of the CB-3000 currently far out weigh any other single design” .

That’s pretty impressive. The long awaited updated design, the CB-6000 Male Chastity Device, was first released in June 2007. Check out Tom Allen’s A week in a CB-6000: My review for a list of differences between the CB-6000 and the very popular CB-3000. The manufacturers themselves writes: “The Innovative ring design consists of three interlocking pieces that fit together like puzzle pieces. The two guide pins hold the top pieces together. The locking pin goes through the middle recessed hole connecting the cage portion to the ring. The new flat design is extremely comfortable”

The CB-6000 is the device that we were lucky enough to be given. The manufacturer provides lots of great hints for how to get the most out of the device: “We highly recommend using a silicone based lubricant after showering. This allows the penis to naturally move up and down in the cage portion … After a break in time period you should be able to wear it for 24/7 for an indefinite period of time … 1 month, 3 months … wearer and Keyholder ultimately determine the length of time”

You can purchase all the CB styles here at Sax. You can also purchase really classy chrome padlocks for them … and also heart shaped padlocks!

I promise, you’ll have hours … no, days and weeks … of fun!

Many thanks: www.chastity-uk.co.uk

Photo: Ms160

Oz KinkFest + the new S(A)X Chastity Cock Strap

Mistress 160 — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 03:44:50 +0000

Everyone’s been enjoying Oz KinkFest in Melbourne. You can read about our adventures during this amazing ten day festival on my blog here and here and here (well a lot happened, it needed three posts LOL).

But one of the nicest things that happened was that I got a parcel from S(A)X while I was down in Melbourne. It contained a new product - the Chastity Cock Strap, which looks like this:

I wrote about the product on my blog (here) and added lots of photos of me installing the device on my husband solipsist.

This is such a nice product! The product information here on S(A)X’s website reads: “the Chastity Cock Strap is made from 15mm wide soft garment nappa folded on to a cotton stiffener to stop stretching. It [is] supplied with two chrome pad locks, that when locked severely restrict the removal of the straps. The locking posts pass through heavy duty eyelets with washers”.

I can vouch for the softness of the leather, the Chastity Cock Strap has a lovely feel to it. Here I am putting the Chastity Cock Strap on sol:

One feature that I really like is that the two straps that go around the cock and balls move, so that you get a perfect fit for any genital size / length. I really like the chrome locks and the cute keys:

This device has lots of kinky play potential. That ring attachment at the top will be extremely useful for restraint.

And of course it also leaves sol’s PA piercing free for play. I really like the look of this device, the dark soft leather and the shiny hard chrome make interesting contrasts. It provides a constant source of restraint and yet leaves all sol’s bits available for torturing. I like it as a device to wear to a play party, or Femdom tea party.

But what about as a chastity device? Obviously it leaves the cock and balls basically exposed, allowing lots of stimulation of various sorts … so yes, you could come with it on. If you were silly enough to do this without permission *grin*. But on the other hand sol confirmed this morning that with the locks fitted to the tightest setting it was quite painful getting an erection. So you could definitely have a lot of fun with this, in terms of T&D and orgasm control games.

Receiving the Chastity Cock Strap was a great finish to this year’s KinkFest and sol wore it to the final event Klub Kunst. It is definitely going to get a lot of wear. If you want to check it out here on S(A)X’s website, click here. Have fun!

(photos: Ms160 and S(A)X)